All too soon, my 20's will be gone & I'll be 30 years old. 30...can it really be? While 30 really is not old at all, I like to exaggerate the idea of it a bit. I find it hard to believe that so much time has passed by. For whatever reason, I have felt the need to think about my life & the years behind me....reflect a bit. I have found myself sitting at the park on a park bench pondering my life...asking myself if my life has been of value & worth. Have I made an impact in the lives of those around me or those I've come in contact with over the years? At the end of my life, will I have left a "legacy" as Nichole Nordeman states in her song below (which, I kind of consider as my theme song)? I pray so. As I've done my thinking, I've been reminded of many wonderful times. I remember helping prepare & serve food during the floods of '93. Then, 15 yrs. later, I found myself carrying food to an area effected by flooding just last spring. I think about my former Sunday School class going to a senior citizens home to make Easter picture frames with the residence & my dressing up as the Easter Bunny & how much joy that brought to those older people. I never dreamt that they would want their picture taken with me & that they would plan to insert that particular picture in the frame they had made with us! They had the time of their lives' with me as I hopped (& yes...I really did hop like a rabbit) around the room though. I recall the countless number of times I have either went to sing in nursing homes or low-income housing areas & the people request song after song & have just been happy to see a "young" face & have someone "young" to talk to that would listen to their stories. I see myself downtown at the men's homeless shelter serving food & then mingling with the men as we laughed & joked together but later praised the Lord together through songs & testimonies. I remember going with some college students to unthinkable areas to search for homeless people to deliver food, clothing & most importantly, the Word of God. I think about my first ever mission trip--to Colorado, teaching Bible to children & at the end of the week, learning that the student I had grown closest to (Joel), had prayed to receive Christ into his heart. I picture myself helping lead a missions class during VBS at FBC O'Fallon & loving on those kids. I remember being assigned to a home in which I set up camp everyday for a week to serve as a leader during a Backyard Bible Club. Daily, my cousin & I led the kids in songs, Bible stories, games, crafts, etc. I think about the time when I volunteered to lead a group during a Disciple Now weekend & after having been assigned to lead middle school girls, I wondered why I volunteered. Though that was my most trying experience, I realized why I did it when weeks later, one of the girls came to salvation. Of course, I think of God calling me to the other side of the world to use the gospel to teach English to Taiwanese students. Still today, I hear from many of those kids that I fell in love with quickly. In my years working at One Way, there were opportunities day in & day out to be used by God. Having worked there 10 years, my mind overflows with stories....whether it was helping someone purchase their first Bible, teaching someone how to use a concordance, praying with a customer about a wayward teen, listening to someone who was just lonely & in need of a friend, etc. . . there was always plenty. Of all that I experienced at One Way, the most difficult time had to be when I helped a young couple find an appropriate song for the funeral of their stillborn infant. As I suggested the song & they listened, tears streamed down their face as they told me it was "perfect." Weeks later, I received a thank you note in the mail expressing their gratitude towards me for my help. Another memory I have is that of a mother entering into the store in search of a book that she could give to her daughter to help teach her about grief as she had just lost her grandmother. As I did some research & the mother browsed the store, her daughter (who was probably 5 or 6) wandered to the front & began to cry. I asked the little girl what was wrong & she told me her grandma died & she was sad. I went around & wrapped my arms around her & began to share with her that I too, had lost my grandma. I talked to her about our grandma's being in heaven with Jesus. When her mom returned to the front to talk to me again, I had found a book that I felt might work. The title was "Sarah's Grandma Went to Heaven." The lady was in disbelief at how fitting the book was...her daughter's name was Sarah. After the funeral had come & gone, the lady & Sarah returned to the store to personally thank me for taking the time & effort to find a book that would help & to thank me especially for the time I spent comforting Sarah when they had been in before. I am so incredibly thankful for each & every opportunity God's blessed me with. I boast not in myself for none of these things would or could have been done apart from Him loving others through me. However, I am glad that over these years, God has seen fit to include me in His plan & to use me. I'm far from where I need to be & where I hope to be but as I move forward, I pray that I will be all that He desires for me to be so that He gets all the praise & glory. My prayer is that of David in Psalms 34:2-3, "My soul will make it's boast in the Lord; The humble will hear it & rejoice. O magnify the Lord with me, And let us exalt His name together." May I, however many years I have left on earth, be about the Father's business.
