Fast forward 5 years to the moment I knew that God was leading N.P. & I to marry one another. I shared with him the news that I had been given in regards to the likelihood that I'd never have kids. I told him that if having children was of utter importance to him, I might not be the girl for him. His response was, "Whether the Lord chooses to bless us with children or not, we will say Blessed be the Name of Our Lord & praise Him." I LOVED his response. However, that did not stop me from having such concerns again. Even the week before our wedding, I was bawling like a baby one night to him saying, "What if I can never give you a child?" He reminded me of that which he had said before as well as the fact that God is in control & that though the doctors may say one thing, that does not mean that is what will be.
Here we are, 3 months into our marriage & astounded by His marvelous work. As God has had to do with me time after time, He's again calling me to have faith & trust Him. That which I thought was most likely impossible, He is making possible. After having some symptoms of pregnancy, I took an at-home test on May 31st. To say I was surprised when the test came back positive would be an understatement. I figured I was probably wasting my money on the test because, after all, it should be hard for me to get pregnant & N.P. & I had only been married for a little over a month. I was stunned. Knowing that there was a possibility that the test could be wrong, right away I made an appointment with my doctor. They got me in within days & the blood tests confirmed that indeed, I was pregnant. Question was, was the pregnancy within the uterus. A week later, N.P. & I went for my first ultrasound & tears streamed down my face when all of a sudden, there appeared OUR baby. Now, almost 11 weeks along & after 3 ultrasounds, Baby Sharma is looking great - growing as he/she should.
Though our child is not even the size of a lime & I cannot feel him/her moving yet, God has already given me a profound love for this baby. Never thought anything could move me like this has. Each time an ultra-sound is done & our baby appears on the screen, I'm weeping in amazement at this little miracle. N.P. & I covet your prayers. Many of you may wonder...what about my health? I am high-risk & therefore, must visit the perinatologist every 2 weeks for the time being. Closer to the due date, I will have to go once a week. While I have been taken off of my blood-thinners, I must inject myself with a shot daily to help thin my blood as during pregnancy, blood clots can be even more likely. My irregular, rapid heartbeat is being monitored too as that could also effect the baby. Please pray for the health of our sweet little one that God is growing within me as well as my health. Obviously, at 11 weeks (tomorrow), we are still not out of the concerning time period. And, anything could happen at anytime. However, we are trusting that God is protecting our little one & has great things in store for this life.
While "our" plans may have included thinking of children down the road (a year from now or so), clearly, God has other plans for us. We know that His plans are ALWAYS greater too. We choose to trust Him through this exciting time & know that He will give us all we need to move into the role as not just marriage partners but parents as well. We're ecstatic over God's goodness to us & we can't quit smiling. Now, if you'll excuse me...must return to our baby name discussion. I've managed to rule out Barnabas & Bartholomew. Yep, someone (actually, a lot of people) seems to think this baby is a boy. Girl or boy, we'll love the child just the same. To God be all the glory!
