I was told this would get easier. While in some ways it has, many days are difficult. I know you are not here. How could I not notice? You may think I have moved on, that others have taken your place. Others have entered into my life but no one will ever be you. Though you are not here & adjusting to that truth has become easier, I miss you no less than the day you left.
I miss having you sitting beside me in Busch Stadium to watch the Cardinals play.
I miss dancing with you.
I miss going to ISI Dinners with you.
I miss not being able to take you to the Zoo in warmer temperatures.
I miss playing in the snow with you.
I miss helping you prepare Nepali meals.
I miss sharing those meals with you in my home and your home.
I miss relaxing in Spellmann with you - sitting on the sofas outside of the computer lab or down in the Connection.
I miss helping you with papers, projects and reports.
I miss waiting for you to appear at ISI meetings.
I miss you showing me your favorite Nepali music videos.
I miss you trying to teach me Nepali.
I miss you laughing at me as I tried speaking Nepali.
I miss seeing you looking sharp in your traditional Nepali clothing.
I miss getting to celebrate birthdays with you.
I miss your hugs.
I miss you telling me of your hopes and dreams of the future.
I miss hearing about those you love the most - your family...your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister.
I miss being honest and sharing things with you.
I miss your trusting me & your opening up & sharing the difficult times of your life with me.
I miss you being here to care for me, give me advice, encourage me & attempting to protect me from those that aren't the best for me.
I miss playing board games with you.
I miss your being at my house till 2 or 3 in the morning while I try to keep my eyes open.
I miss your not wanting to leave our house to return to school.
I miss asking you questions to get to know you and then hearing your responses.
I miss you waiting for my answers to those same questions.
I miss you making up your own questions.
I miss grocery shopping with you.
I miss going to the movies with you.
I miss allowing you to get in the driver's seat of my car and drive around.
I miss the smile that came upon your face when I told you that you were doing a good job driving.
I miss driving down the road wondering if you would ever decide where you wanted to eat.
I miss hearing you say, "Let's move."
I miss hearing you say, "Let it be."
I miss eating Indian food with you.
I miss having slushies with you.
I miss going to Steak & Shake with you.
I miss your going to church with me.
I miss your being in the Realm with me.
I miss searching the Loop for things with you.
I miss singing Taylor Swift songs with you ("You Belong With Me", "Romeo & Juliet", "White Horse") in my car.
I miss hearing you sing James Blunt's "You're Beautiful"
I miss hearing you sing Guns & Roses "Knockin' on Heaven's Door"
I miss hearing you sing Bryan Adams' "Everything I Do, I Do For You"
I miss singing "Must Be the Money" (Monkey!!) with you.
I miss your getting excited when my phone would ring & play "Boom Boom Pow"
I miss picking you up at the airport after returning to St. Louis.
I miss you always wanting my camera so that you could get "snaps."
I miss you making me pose for photos.
I miss walking with you, hiking with you...you patiently waiting for me.
I miss sitting on the grass of the riverfront letting the cool winds blow through our hair.
I miss fighting with you in the kitchen as we got icing all over each other...and water...and ice.
I miss photo shoots with you.
I miss your holding your country's flag proudly while allowing me to join you for a picture.
I miss you asking me about my day at work.
I miss showing you the St. Louis Arch.
I miss beating you at tennis on the Nintendo Wii.
I miss singing Karaoke on the Wii with you.
I miss getting to watch the joy on my parents faces when they see you.
I miss watching you play football (soccer).
I miss hearing you talk about Cricket.
I miss seeing you uneasy with "Easy" around. Funny time.
I miss picnics with you.
I miss sitting with you on a park bench and sharing our hearts through conversation.
I miss driving you to the India Market and your introducing me to new things there.
I miss hearing you say, "I love you."
Mainly.....I just miss your being here. I miss everything about you. Miles may be between us but my love for you is no less. My thoughts of you are not less frequent. Actually, my thoughts of you are daily. You may not be here but you can rest assured that I certainly have not forgotten you. Each day, these things above or the thinks I think of. There are many more that I did not even mention too. They come to mind and I smile, laugh or fight the tears. You are remembered. You are loved.